Yakuza Supports Underage Drinking

Published 2025-12-1 by Margaret The M.A.D.D. Mom

One week ago, I came home from my two full-time works shifts and as always, I went to check on my dear son Billy. However, when I opened the door despite his incessant pestering to me about knocking, what I found mortified me. He was playing on his Game Station and on the screen, he was in a bar drinking! My Billy is only 16! I told him he was far too young to be playing a game with alcohol in it but he wouldn't turn the game off. An argument between the both of us broke out while he was still playing this game and after he left the bar, imagine my horror when I saw the character on the screen proceed to have brawls with people on the street. He was just like Billy's father and my ex-husband.

After this point, I demanded he turn the game off but he kept blabbering about saving a telephone booth like that had anything to do with the situation. I tried shutting the Game Station off myself but these fancy computers go over my head so I resorted to shutting the house's power off to stop the game from corrupting my Billy any further. He was upset at me but mother knows best in these situations and I will not allow any child in my house to view anything which contains alcohol in it.

The next day before Billy had to go to school, I asked him the title of the game he was playing and after threatening to take the Game Station away if he didn't tell me, he told me the game was called "Yakuza Zero". During my break at my first shift of work at the D.M.V., I looked up what this "Yakuza Zero" was all about and what I learned horrified me. It's a game were you run around beating people up among many other atrocities, the worst being the fact that you can drink alcohol and then go and beat people up. This is just like the game Grand Theft Auto Four we at M.A.D.D. demanded its maker take off store shelves.

During my break at my second shift at the T.S.A., I looked more into this "Yakuza Zero" and learned it was part of an entire series of games where you commit heinous crimes. I looked more into the "Zero" game and learned it's about a man whose name I have absolutely no idea how to say because these games seem to be set in China and I cannot speak Chinese. I will call him John Yakuza for now. What I found next was of utter horror to me. I learned that John Yakuza is only 20 years old in this "Yakuza Zero" game! That's underage drinking! Mr. Yakuza is a horrible influence on our youths being that the games clearly support underage drinking.

I came home that day, took the game, and went down to town hall and demanded that these games be banned from store shelves in our town. After this, I took my dear Billy to church and made him pray his little heart out to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ that he would never touch another computer game with alcohol in it again. Then as penance, I took $1000 of the money he earned from his job and donated it to the church and he will now be paying a 20% tithe each to our local church and to M.A.D.D. every paycheck. To make sure the negative influence that game had on my poor Billy doesn't win, I also used his money to install a breathalyzer lock in his car. Hopefully with the success of the H.A.L.T. Drunk Driving Act, all cars will be equipped with these and with the advent of AI, soon we may see an era where cars can use AI to monitor drivers through a camera, assess their driving, and use this to stop the car and send the information to police while an intoxicated driver is on the road.

I call for everyone to come together and demand that the makers of "Yakuza" pull these games from store shelves and issue an apology for encouraging underage drinking and reprehensible behavior. They should be ashamed for making such horrendous games. However, seeing as these games are Chinese, I wouldn't be surprised if the Chinese Socialists are purposely corrupting our youths with these games since they like to censor everything and brainwash their citizens into thinking the Chinese government's spying and control over them is okay. "Yakuza" is now banned in my house and while my Billy may go on about how some person named Kieryoo is a better parental figure than I or his father ever was, I know deep down in my heart, I'm a better parent than most.

Thank you, Moxistan News for accepting my writings. All the local news networks here in East Virginia wouldn't accept my article.